Chapter 9 – One Peek



“Invite who?”




“Eric?” he replied leisurely at the exact moment Pam’s fangs threatened to sink in. A small snore escaped him, terrifying Sookie to the bone that all hope was lost, only to be surprised by the mumble, “Well, what’s he waiting for? He should come in.”


Sookie cried out, fearing fangs had finally penetrated her. Instead she was the recipient of Pam’s eager tongue, lapping at a small scratch, and she squirmed with the strange sensation of the cold and wet muscle against her throat. Luckily it was all the damage she sustained by Pam, her Maker flying in with haste, and wrestling the feral vampire off Sookie despite his weakened state. Pam, however, was the one to cry out in triumph from their brief scuffle when she easily circumvented his hold, protectively placing her between Jason and Sookie, her mind clearly set on killing one or both, her Maker of little concern.


“Command her to stop!” Sookie shrieked out at a weakened Eric.


“You don’t think I fucking tried that?” Eric rasped out. “Whatever the fuck this is, it’s overridden my Maker’s commands.”


“She wants to eat me, Eric,” she whimpered when Pam appeared to move toward her once more, and with little thought she backed her body into his, seeking protection. “Make her stop!”


“MINE!” Pam snarled again, this time the words clearly meant for Eric as her eyes narrowed on her next faery-flavoured treat that happened to be in his grasp.


Eric pulled Sookie into his body tighter, leaving not an inch between them, and with a deafening roar he countered, proclaiming the same word, his own fangs out and pointing dangerously close to Sookie’s throat. “Say it,” he whispered, “she’ll back off.”


Sookie hesitated momentarily, however, Pam’s continual threat made her exclaim the word, ‘His.’, and with that fangs struck.


Pam backed off instantly, deferring to the largest predator in the room while Sookie cried out with the sudden pain as Eric greedily drank, the flavour overwhelming. With a well-aimed kick to the balls, she managed to extract herself from him while he groaned in pain, and running for the bed, she seized Jason and with an audible pop they were gone.


Despite bleeding profusely, she looked over Jason first, assuring he was safe before seeing to her own injuries. She stared at her darkened eyes in the mirror, skin pale from all the blood loss, ignoring the tears, her brother looking only slightly worse for wear. A gentle hand travelled through her brother’s sweat matted hair before she spoke in a whisper, “Never again, Jas. We’re never ever seeing them again.”



“I want to go back to Pam!”




“Please, I miss her,” Jason whined. “You agree with me, don’t ya, Doc?”


Dr. Ludwig nodded, “Like I told that Maker of hers, moving these two away from each other is the worst idea right now. They started a bond, you gotta wait it out.”


“I don’t trust her not to kill you. It’s not happening, Jas,” Sookie replied sternly. “It’s over, we’re going home. We’ll just have to make sure she stays near enough,” his eyes lit up in hope with the thought, though she soon found him pouting, “but I’ll be damned if I ever let her get close to you again!”


“You might want to check that with your great-grandfather,” Dr. Ludwig noted while presenting Sookie with her extortionate bill.


“What’s that supposed to mean?” Sookie demanded with a deep-set frown, for both the comment and the tally of Jason’s injuries.


She shrugged while packing the last of her things, “Showed up when I left the Maker and his feral Childe. Silly vampire, like he never saw someone high on faery blood. He asked after you, by the way.”


“What did you say?” she stammered out, caught off guard by the comment.


“Doctor-patient confidentiality. Your secrets are safe with me,” she grinned. “Offered to pay quite a bit to know.”


“He’d be better off paying Jason’s bill,” Sookie grumbled under her breath, still outraged by the mind boggling amount of numbers staring back at her.


“Oh, he will,” she grinned, snapping the envelope from her hands.


“So you gave me the bill, why?” she demanded with a tap to her feet.


“Figured I could cash it twice, but considering the company you keep, I prefer the promise of repeat business,” she winked before teleporting away.


“Sookie, please?” Jason whimpered while she was still silently cussing out the opportunistic little doctor. “Can I at least call her?”


“Out of the question!” she scowled, moving to the door from where she sensed the familiar knock of Niall.


“Fuck off!” Sookie cried out, startling her great-grandfather when it was directed toward the blonde vampire who towered behind him.


“Sookie,” Niall warned. “I expect you to be cordial, and this is very much unlike you.”


“This is the new me,” she spoke through clenched teeth. “I’m NOT inviting him in.”


“A moment please,” he spoke to Eric, leaving him outside of the hotel suite. He gave a reluctant nod, trying to make eye contact with Sookie to express his genuine remorse.


“I don’t care what you say,” Sookie hissed at Niall. “He and that shit piece of a vampire he calls his daughter are never coming near us again! Jason almost died!”


“Come here,” Niall urged with open arms, sensing the stress that had been building up inside her throughout the entire ordeal. “There, there, I know it was hard, but she would not have killed him.”


“You weren’t there,” she sobbed into his shoulder. “He was nearly gone.”


He kissed the crown of her head softly, humming an old familiar song. “She could not have killed him. They have bonded, she physically can’t.”


“See, Sis!” Jason exclaimed in glee. “Just take me back so I can get a sponge bath with Nursie Pam!”


“Granddaddy, I can’t,” she whispered through her tears, “I can’t trust it not to happen again.”


“Her Maker has agreed to supervise her for the remainder of their honeymoon, and I suggested you stay here and do the same for Jason.”


“Do I even have a choice?” Sookie demanded bitterly. “Is this even a suggestion?”


Niall sighed heavily, patting the sofa seat beside him. “The Northman is genuinely remorseful for what happened to you both. Young Pamela is beside herself. At the very least you owe it to them to engage the conversation. Now is not the time to act like a child. I can always call for Claude in your place if you prefer, but at least give him the opportunity to apologise.”


“Fine!” she huffed, crashing into back of the sofa. “I’ll talk to him, and only, and I mean only, if I feel it’s safe they can continue their honeymoon. For whatever reason, Jason seems to really like that psycho bitch.”


“YES!” Jason roared excitedly, injury and fatigue already forgotten. “I’m getting ma Pammy back!”


“Look after him for me,” she smiled at Niall with a worried glance over to her brother who was moving to a victory dance in his underwear and socks. “He’s supposed to be resting. I’ll go talk to Eric.” With the amused nod from Niall she shifted out the door nervously, finding a reluctant Eric leaning against the opposite wall.


“I’m still not inviting you in,” she said softly, “but I’ll hear what you’ve come to say.”


“You’re hurt,” he spoke in an unfamiliar tone, strangely caring, his eyes inspecting the thick, white bandage at her neck, hands itching to reveal the damage inflicted.


“Yeah,” she replied with a roll of her eyes, “you should know, you were there. It’s nothing.”


“It’s not nothing,” Eric countered, “I fucking hurt you, badly.”


“Yeah,” she whispered, her eyes failing to meet his. “You did.”


“At least let me heal your wound,” Eric offered, his hand moving to remove the thick wad of bandages and instinctively, she flinched. “Sookie, please,” he tried again in that strangely gentle tone that only made her hate him more. Things were just damn easier when he was a cold and heartless monster.


“No!” she cried out, shrugging him away. “I want this scar! That way at every family function we have together, you can remember what utter lack of control you and that pathetic excuse of a Childe of yours have!”


“Family functions?” he queried, ignoring the slight at Pam.


“Yeah,” she grumbled, “Thanksgiving, Christmas, Easter, you name it. Your attendance will be required by Gran, not to mention all the high holy Faery days. Looks like we’re stuck for life. Jas can’t wait to get back to Pam and I assume she feels the same, otherwise you surely wouldn’t be here.”


“She seems rather persistent,” he agreed, sharing her grimace. “But I’m not here for her, I’m here because of you. That scar shouldn’t be your burden to carry, I’ll carry that shame forever, up here,” Eric said, tapping at his forehead. “It’s where I keep all my mistakes. Let me make this right.”


“I rather you didn’t,” she replied coolly. “A drop of blood won’t make this right. You know that as well as I do, so let’s not pretend it does. I’m here for Jason, not me. Can you guarantee Pam won’t kill him?”


“Yes,” he returned confidently, “I won’t hesitate to kill her if his life is at stake again. I made this vow to your great-grandfather.”


She eyed him suspiciously, seeking an affirmation in his body language to that promise, “Huh,” she remarked, sensing the sincerity on display. “Niall really does drive a hard bargain.”


“It was my idea,” he conceded.


She smiled tightly, “Well, okay then.”



Her job as chaperone turned out to be not as cumbersome as she had expected, and Sookie had to admit the small tropical paradise agreed with her. Things had been surprisingly enjoyable, lying out in the sun all day, and then there was Eric who failed to share her sentiments. Every night he was met with her delicious après-soleil scent, and the temptress he had now declared her to be knew it affected him. Off-the-rack bikinis were not his friends, the fucking pieces of fabric revealed both way too much and way too little of what he truly wanted to see. It was becoming increasingly hard for him to remember what the normal state of his cock once was. Adding insult to injury, she wore his mark like a tramp stamp for all to see with her unnatural fondness for off-the-shoulder tops, it only made him fucking harder. Pam behaved, thankfully. Jason was a horny bastard, nothing new there.


The only bright spot he had discovered in the few days that would forever be known as Purgahorny was that Sookie was a fun drunk. While observing Pam and Jason on their honeymoon adventures from a distance, he was always sure to top off her fruity cocktails while she wasn’t looking. As a result, things had been surprisingly cordial between them.


“Eric, exactly how much is the penalty you have to pay Niall?” she wondered aloud, knowing there would be ramifications from the broken clause of the contract that dictated no blood bond would be allowed between Jason and Pam until at least thirty days of marriage.


“Who wants to know?”


“Me, obviously,” she tittered, moving her body just so with a hidden smile. It was almost painfully easy to elicit anything from him with a mere shift and a good batting of her eyes. Serves him right, the bastard, she wasn’t anywhere near forgetting the mar on her neck courtesy of him. Guilt, she had decided, like everything else, looked especially good on Eric Northman.


“Right,” he replied, eagerly sensing she was just about drunk enough to be all kinds of fun, he moved on his side towards her, leaning his elbow on his lounge bed. “Why do you want to know?”


“Popped into your former digs today,” she shrugged nonchalantly. “I’d like to redecorate before I move in.”


His eyes narrowed, the loss of that apartment still a sore subject, recognising the calculated stance of her gaze far too well now. She was worse than Pam, this one.


“So you don’t like the rustic feel?”


“Rustic?” she cried out. “Try bomb site!”


“It wasn’t like that when I left it,” he lied, the perfect picture of innocence, if innocence was a six foot something asshole, that is.


“My ass, it wasn’t like that!”


“And what an ass it is,” he grinned.


“Stop it,” she huffed, arms firmly crossed over her chest.


“Stop what?”


“You know what,” Sookie warned. “We agreed, no more games.”


“Who said I’m playing?”


“Eric,” she whispered with a tremble that did all sorts of things to him that he’d never admit to anyone, let alone to himself. “I mean it.”


Sensing her sudden trepidation, he blurted out, “Let me see your tits.”


“Excuse me?” Fuck, not as drunk as she appeared.


“Did I say that out loud?” he posed innocently, only to be greeted by her stormy eyes.


“No,” she bit back sardonically, covering any sight of her breasts as best she could. “I plucked it from your perverted mind. I’d ask if your momma forgot to breast feed you, but you’re too damn old! What the hell is your obsession with tits?”


“Just your tits,” he mumbled, accidentally voicing his inner thoughts for real this time. Was it possible for vampires to contract foot-in-mouth disease?


“That’s it! I’m going home!” she cried out, angrily stomping away. “I’m calling Claude! You can have him ogling your ass all night and see how you feel!”


“I’m sorry, okay,” he apologised, moving to obstruct the entryway to her little cottage that she still refused to allow him in. “I didn’t mean it like that.”


“So, you don’t want to see my tits?” she demanded with a sceptical brow.


“Fuck, yes, I do!”


“I’ve heard enough,” she said with a disappointed shake of her head. “Let me through.”


“Wait,” he pleaded, touching her for the first time since the biting incident, relief flooding his system when she didn’t instantly recoil. “Let me explain.”


“Why you would want to see my tits? I think that’s pretty self-explanatory; you’re a pig!”


“I fucking love those tits, okay?” he cried out, startling her slightly with the intensity and himself with his outright honesty. “I spend way too much of my time preoccupied with them. If I didn’t like them so much, I’d hate them on principle!”


Sookie wasn’t quite sure how to respond to that, “You’ve thought about this way too long and way too hard, haven’t you?”


Eric snorted, swallowing the comment of what else was long and hard. His tone, however, fell quite serious, “If I wasn’t so obsessed with seeing them, I wouldn’t have dropped the ball like I did.” Or be in the possession of a set of blue ones. “Jason would never have gotten hurt.”


“And seeing them would solve this?”


“Well, if I can touch them too,” he grinned suggestively.


“Don’t push your luck, buddy!” Sookie huffed, while she continued to eye him suspiciously, “This will make it stop, and you’ll act like a decent human being?”


“Yes,” he nodded confidently, “well, the human part is a far reach.”


“One peek,” she offered.


“One peek,” he agreed instantly. “No touching.”


“Close your eyes,” she demanded while turning around shyly.


“Now is the time for modesty?” Eric complained, regretting his words instantly with the warning glare she tossed over her shoulder.


“I said a peek, not a striptease,” she pointed out. When she was assured his eyes remained closed, Sookie quickly unlatched the fastening underneath her shirt before pulling all the different fabrics up, intending to hide her face during the brief peek. She doubted she’d be able to stand the scrutiny and would assure the peek would last no more for a second.


“Take it off! Take it all off!”


“JASON!” Sookie screeched in horror while frantically covering herself up just in time to see Pam scowl at her mortified brother.


“You had to speak, didn’t you?!” Pam scolded. “I, for one, was enjoying the view, and now you made it go away!”


He ignored his newly wed wife, still staring dumbfounded over the excitement caused by his baby sister. “Stop thinking about them!” Sookie cried out. “They’re just boobs!”


“Oh, for fuck’s sake,” Pam complained, spinning his body towards her and lifting up her own shirt.


“Oh, hey little Fun Bags,” he smiled. “Missed you guys.”


“Good God!” Sookie cried out, turning on her heels and crashing into Eric in the process. “Am I doomed to see everyone’s private parts?”


“You’ve yet to see mine,” Eric grinned, while catching her unsteady form, “You don’t even need to ask.”


“Gross!” she shrieked. “You said this would stop!”


“Never got my peek, now did I?” he pointed out, expectantly roving his eyes over her concealing shirt.


“Oh no! The Sookie funhouse is closed! You had your shot, it’s gone.”


“And what a shot it was,” Pam grinned from behind them while Eric threatened to explode at the lost opportunity.


“Pam,” he warned. “Get to your room!”


“What about my bedtime story?” she pouted. Once Pam had caught wind of the existence of Gran’s porno, it had become their shared entertainment in the early hours of the morning when she and her Maker were the only ones still up. Eric had assumed Pam had enough sense not to mention it in front of the Stackhouse siblings. Well, fuck me like a fat pink pony!


“Pamela!” he barked. “Room. Now!”


“Fine,” she whined. “Come on, Jason, you can look at my boobs some more.” He merely bobbed his head eagerly, following her lead.


“You read her bedtime stories?” Sookie asked incredulously. “Let me guess, do they start with ‘Dear Penthouse,’?”


“Something like that,” he grinned, happy to know their shared entertainment remained undetected. “Care to write one of those yourself?”


“I’m serious, Eric,” she said. “It was once and never again. I’m going to bed.”


“Right,” he sighed dejectedly, the determination in her eyes speaking of volumes he never wished to read and reluctantly moved away to his own cottage. “Goodnight, my tempestuous little faery.”


“Hey Eric!” she called out, forcing him to turn his gaze back again, and suddenly, there they were; the Tits of Terror in their full glory while she shyly looked away, open to his gaze for a brief second. He wasn’t quite sure how to react, whether to fall to his knees in worship, beg for more, or sell his soul. Instead, he roared with laughter.


Quickly she covered herself again, despite already being covered, scrambling to set herself to rights while his stomach hurt like hell, but he couldn’t stop. “I knew it!” she shouted angrily through his guffaws. “Everything’s a fucking game to you! Fuck you, Eric Northman! I hate your guts!”


“No, you misunderstand,” he wheezed out, “They’re lopsided!”


“Well, thanks a lot,” she scowled, becoming even angrier if that was possible, the stinging at the corners of her eyes transitioning into tears. “You really know how to kick a girl when she’s down.”


“No, I mean it’s perfect!” he continued, failing to convey what had caused his amusement. “You’re fucking perfect with lopsided breasts!” He moved in close, gaining every inch of space she desperately put between them, thanking every deity he had ever come across that she still stood outside that pesky threshold, “Sookie, you are just perfect.”


“You mean it?” she whimpered, hating the insecurity he’d triggered in her and how clearly it was on display.


“Best tits I’ve ever seen,” he confided, “and I’ve seen enough to know.”


“Thank you, I guess,” she sniffed, finally daring to look up into his eyes again, finding him suddenly very close. “Did it work at least?”


“No,” he spoke hoarsely with a shake of his head, not a speck of regret on display, “not one bit.”




A/N: Much thanks to msbuffy who informed me Penthouse was the magazine to write to, and for all her editing work on this.


*snickers* Hope you all liked Sookie’s lopsided boobs… lol… poor Jason, he’s going to have to recover from that although Pam seems happy to help… and in case you’re wondering, yes, Sookie is doomed to see everyone’s private bits but Erics…


Hope you all liked, let me know in the comment section 😀



74 thoughts on “Chapter 9 – One Peek

  1. Your funniest chapter yet! Oh my –the Tits of Terror lean like the Tower of Pisa? And….I meant to comment a couple of chapters earlier —way to go Gran! If I had a hot guy like Godric after me, I’d take him on in a heartbeat (I’m 64)! Nothing to make you feel young like a young’un….. 😀

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thanks! Glad to hear you thought it was funny, msbuffy and I surely had the most fun discussing this one with the reveal of the Tits of Terror.

      In all honesty I can’t remember if it was ever mentioned but I don’t think Gran is all that old, probably in her sixties. She’s a baby compared to Godric of course!


    2. Go for it, girl! Doesn’t God have a wacky sense of humor though? We get older, and we’re ready to go! Our men age with us, and they just want sit in their recliners and watch TV. Used to be them chasing us! No wonder they call us cougars! 🙂 Grr…

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Suck like a vampire? 😀 Ooh I hate to see how you react next week when it’s the last week before Christmas break and knowing how that chapter ends…

      I think I’ll be booking a stay in msbuffy’s basement again…

      Liked by 2 people

          1. If she can get into PA, we’ll send her over to The Asylum. There’s always PLENTY to eat over there, and lots of tits. She’ll really think she died and went to heaven! Save that pull-out couch for her maker. 🙂

            Liked by 1 person

            1. But… but… we were gonna braid each other’s hair and talk about boys. Don’t ruin my Pam fun time by making her eat things at the Asylum she doesn’t want to eat. Anyway you don’t put Eric in the pull-out, that’s what the bed is for!

              Liked by 1 person

              1. True… Not sure there’s one big enough for him. Easily remedied. He’s imaginary, I’ll just get him an imaginary bed! 🙂


        1. Feral Pam has been uninvited to this part of the States, and the King of PA has put out a price on her head, so not even her gorgeous maker can do anything about it and hisviks can visit any time she likes. She has Favored Ingrate status. 🙂

          Liked by 1 person

      1. Gran in the books was only in her early 70’s, but yes, still a baby compared to Godric. I say “only” because my mother is 76 and roaring around like she’s still in her 40’s or 50’s. She gets around better than me sometimes. If you’re using canon Gran, and I hope you are, she would have been the age of the generation attending “key parties” in the 70’s when she would have looked perfect standing next to Godric.

        Hey, let me know when to get the game room ready! We’ll have fun writing more cliffhangers so we can both really suck! 🙂 Oh! It will be even worse while I’m on vacation for two weeks and they’re left with a cliffhanger! Aww… Let me know how you like your coffee or whatever morning beverage. We’ll make sure everything’s here & cozy for you! 🙂

        Liked by 2 people

  2. My sides hurt from reading this directly after the current chapter of another hilarious update! You and Kelpie are killing me!
    Can’t wait to see where you leave us for the Christmas break!

    Liked by 2 people

        1. LOL! Don’t take much of what we say too seriously. Does this story seem as if it’s going anywhere near dark? After lopsided tits and Eric Northman laughing so hard he can barely stop? With Jason as one of the lead characters? Three guesses as to which way it’s going… 🙂

          Liked by 2 people

          1. Well, of course she’s not a prize! She’s not something to be won like some pig at the county fair! She’s a woman that Eric will have to treat with respect to win over…

            Who am I kidding? Have Pam push them in the bedroom, lock the door, and I’m sure Eric will help her figure out what to do next! 🙂

            Liked by 2 people

  3. Purgahorny! Lol. Eric seems to have acknowledged that he likes Sookie. Does he just want to bed her or is there already more there for him? Don’t know how long Sookie’s gonna keep up the anger. It must be so exhausting.

    Liked by 2 people

  4. Hey! Joe loved it! I haven’t seen him laugh that loud or that hard since our wedding! LOL! 🙂 I laughed my ass off editing this chapter, reading it before I sent it back to you, discussing which porn magazine had the better “Dear , I’ve never written a letter like this before, but…” cause you know they’re real, and then reading it again this evening with my hubby while we both laughed raucously. Glad the houses are so far apart here! The comments from everyone are just as funny! All you readers made my evening! 🙂

    Hey! It’s Dec. 18th, and it’s finally snowing in Pittsburgh! We got an early Christmas present! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Well by the sounds of it Joe should have really ended our who better to write to argument… Of course they’re real, Eric and Pam have submitted many of those letter I’m sure, just to mess with the blood bags!

      Liked by 1 person

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