Thanksgiving Fixin’s 38

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#38

 

“Pamela, darling, you have to get the recipe for this,” Niall groaned with delight while the spaghetti flavoured cake was attacked with gusto. “I want this for dessert every night.”

 

“Niall, we have to go now,” she returned impatiently while gesturing to the white chariot that already contained all their children dozing contentedly. “We have to be on the plane by sunrise.”

 

“Just one more piece?” he pleaded, eyeing the groom’s cake that only seemed to be touched by him and Jason.

 

“Fine,” she sighed before gesturing to one of the staff to wrap up the rest of the cake to take along. “Then we leave. Lafayette, you take those cans of my carriage right now! We’re not hillbillies!”

 

He shrugged and did what he was told while mumbling about their family relations not being too far off, leaving the ‘Just Married Bitches!” sign in place before joining the small crowd that had gathered to wave them off. Soon they would depart to their honeymoon on Eric’s plantation in Barbados, leaving the artificial winter wonderland that was their wedding theme behind.

 

“You’re the best wife ever,” Niall announced almost incoherently while still digesting the last bites of cake before impatiently waving everyone off and pulling her along into the carriage where she landed with a shriek in his lap. The onlookers only ever saw the flailing legs moving excitedly in the air until the unicorn-pulled carriage disappeared from view.

 

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Jason’s dry mouth mumbled nonsensically, drooling over the pale white chest his head was resting on. His left hand lingered over something soft and cool while a pleasant warmth resided between his splayed out thighs. Narrowed slits opened in fear of morning light but he found the room to be lit only by the faint illumination of a digital clock. He groaned with sudden realisation, but any hasty movement was impended by the pounding in his head. He slowly rolled his head to the middle of a pillow while carefully extracting his hand from Willa’s body who lay to his other side, her ill-fitting bridesmaid dress half off her body.

 

Taking a deep breath with his squinted eyes he dared peek at his own state of his undress when he carefully lifted the covers up in the relative darkness. He sighed a breath of relief when he saw the familiar sight of his tighty whities underwear. His relief; however, was short-lived as the limited light in the room caught the glint of two eyes between his thighs

 

“JESUS FUCKING CHRIST!”

 

“Morning stud,” the tiny doctor greeted with a cluck of her tongue before crawling up his body to reach for the bottle of tequila on the night stand and pouring half the contents into her drinking helmet with matching Viking horns. The movements and Jason’s hoarse shout had woken the two nocturnal creatures beside him as Dr Ludwig continued to sit on Jason’s bare chest gurgling her morning breath away with the alcohol.

 

“Did we?” Jason winced while gesturing his finger between them.

 

“No, you fucking prudes!” Ludwig exclaimed while spraying out the alcohol from her mouth with the preposterous thought. “Like I’d have sex with you lot. No offense, but I’m a little out of your league. I only came in here because baby vamp over there thought she was pregnant and you fumbling idiots were too amusing not to watch.”

 

“I vaguely remember sipping off of Preston,” Willa whispered while she came to with the same fears of what exactly had been so amusing to the doctor.

 

“Yes,” Ludwig scoffed as she scooted herself off the bed. “And your tiny little brain panicked and thought you were pregnant.”

 

“Sorry,” she offered sheepishly before Ludwig dismissively waved them away, and with a sour face she put her dark rimmed sunglasses on and popped away. The three remaining bed mates groaned as the angry tire spin of the doctor’s hummer in the gravel drive attacked the weak states of their brain before speeding off in what they assumed was a cloud of dust.

 

“Bloody hell!” Spike whimpered while stretching his naked body against Jason without much thought, causing him to instantly seek refuge with Willa. “Some party.”

 

“Did we-?” Willa asked with a discernible wobble in her voice.

 

“I’m not sure,” Jason answered with equal concern retreating from their close hold instantly. He ran his hand down his tight throat with a hiss. “Which one of you fed on me?”

 

“I think we both did,” Willa returned shyly as her fingers found another set of fang marks with her superior vision in the dark. Both sets of dark brown eyes found Spike’s blue ones hoping he would give insight. He simply turned his body to light the room with a soft light before meeting the eager sets of wanting eyes.

 

“Know as much as you lot,” he shrugged before taking a swig from the bottle of booze the doctor left behind. “Think I was more pissed than the two of you combined.”

 

“We were mad?” Willa pondered aloud while pulling the sheets closer over her body in an attempt to regain her modesty.

 

“Drunk, Luv,” he grinned in explanation, till he winced in pain when the corner of his mouth came into contact the swelling of a bruised cheek. “Bollocks. Think Vicky got mad at me though.”

 

“Yes!” Jason said excitedly happy to regain some sort of memory. “I caught you when Eric punched you in the face. You were out cold and Willa helped me carry you here.”

 

“With Preston!” Willa pitched in cheerfully, happy to uncover some memories of her own.

 

“Wha` I do this time?” Spike whined while caressing the swollen skin, checking for any further damages.

 

“I think you danced a little too closely with Sookie,” Willa recalled vaguely while removing an empty champagne bottle from beside her thighs where she prayed upon God that it was the remnants from the bubbly drink that explained the stickiness on her thighs.

 

“Mmm, sounds like me,” the vampire admitted. “Did I at least ge` a good punch in?”

 

“Erm.” Jason and Willa exchanged a brief apologetic glance before they answered in unison, “No.”

 

“Bugger tha`,” Spike complained. “I’ll clock the sod next time I see him.”

 

“I think I kissed him,” Jason suddenly shrieked.

 

“Me an` you, Luv?” Spike grinned with a demonstrative eyebrow waggle.

 

“No! Eric,” he answered with wide eyes remembering the tongue he drove into the father of his sister’s children with no warning while Sookie and Spike danced the night away. “I remember somethin` about him being my soul.”

 

“YES!” Willa shouted causing them all to cringe with the sudden assault to their ear drums. “You kept saying you had to get your soul back. Then the blonde bit will forgive you. That Eric was your blonde bit.”

 

“I wasn` talking about some chit named Buffy again, was I?” Spike grumbled and heaved a heavy sigh when their diplomatic silence spoke volumes. “Did I cry?” Again silence reigned, causing Spike to wash away the bitter taste of the morning with the heavy spirit on the side table.

 

“I think we were all nursing our wounds over something blonde,” Willa offered sympathetically as their eyes met.

 

“Oh my God!” Jason exclaimed, giddy with excitement. “You two kissed.”

 

Two sets of eyes widened quickly to deny as much before the memories came flooding back. “Please tell me that’s all we did,” Willa pleaded desperately with her addled brain. “Is this yours?” she asked timidly shoving off the oversized golden band from her thumb and handing it back to him when he nodded. “Think we took our faux engagement a little far last night.”

 

“Last thing I `member is your lips, Luv,” Spike shrugged, glad to know it was all just play. His eyebrows scrunched in a little looking at Jason. “An` I may have been cupping your balls at the time.”

 

Fear exploded behind Jason’s eyes as his upper body swung up in shock, only to scream upon sighting his reflection in the mirror. His previous horror was overtaken, not by the fang marks or the red stained lip marks left behind by blood all over his body rather than the traditional lipstick. No, Jason sat in wonder touching what once was his hair. “Why the hell do I look like Spike?”

 

Willa cried a little with wide eyes as she discovered the bottles of hydrogen peroxide in the bathroom. It wasn’t the champagne that had left her sticky between the thighs after all; she prayed against all odds that her memory was off, but no such relief was found as she peered into her briefs and found her pubic hairs the same platinum shade as Jason’s head.  “What the hell is a ‘Spikette’?” she demanded of the word etched in permanent marker on the skin above her mound.

 

“Hey I’m one too,” Jason said gruffly as he took in the inked tramp stamp on his lower back while taking in a closer inspection of his marked body in the mirror.

 

“Guess you two are mine now, bitches,” Spike grinned as the sheet on his body fell perilously close to revealing all of his nudity in the dimly lit room. When the two dumbfounded faces appeared to be descending into absolute horror and little whimpers were becoming a prelude to breakdowns, Spike finally relented. “Relax you gits, nothin` happened.”

 

“Nothing?” Willa whispered. “Except the kiss.”

 

“We had a bit of a snog,” he shrugged with the authority of someone who had found all his memories again. “It was innocent in comparison to the one the lil` doctor an` I shared. Now le`s get some kip and later today we’ll sort out your hairs in Pam’s lil` salon.”

 

“Promise we’ll never speak of this again,” Willa requested softly of them both when they settled back into bed again.

 

“Whatever you want, Luv,” Spike agreed, not all too fond to relive every event of the night either.

 

Jason looked a little sullen at the prospect until, like a puppy he found his own waggling tail to cheer him up again. “You think there’s any of that spaghetti cake left?”

 

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“Is everybody gone?” Sookie whispered when she joined Eric in the living room, freshly woken from a restful sleep. It was already well past dawn and she marvelled at the small spread of breakfast he had attempted to cook for her.

 

“Finally have the house to ourselves now,” he murmured contentedly before kissing her softly and guiding her to sit on his lap while he fed her the unusual array of breakfast foods. It was more an assortment of her favoured foods, most were still the strange concoctions her pregnant body had craved but she was touched by the effort he had put into it.

 

“This is nice,” she smiled while he played with the silk sash of her robe. “Just us.”

 

He hummed contentedly in return of the house being filled with their small family while she daintily dabbed the corners of her mouth with the cloth napkin. “I need your help.”

 

“With what?” she questioned as her arms moved around his neck. “Thank you for breakfast,” Sookie smiled against his lips before losing them both in a deepened kiss.

 

“Picking out a colour,” he finally managed to answer when he stood up and picked her up as if he were carrying her over a threshold. With less haste and practice he managed to set her down unharmed in the study where his large desk was covered in floor plans and elevations.

 

“I’m building this, to go at the end of the property, on the hill,” he explained showing the approximate location near the old Stackhouse homestead making it appear like a guesthouse in comparison to the newly planned building. “Now I can’t decide whether to go with this,” Eric said holding up a very bright pink paint swatch, “or this,” he finished with a muted yellow in his other hand.

 

“I think I like it in white,” Sookie returned with confusion while she gestured towards the renderings of the finished home.

 

“Sookie,” he growled impatiently. “I am asking if you if you prefer it for you,” he demanded holding up the yellow swatch again before exchanging it for the pink, “or for Pam.”

 

“Oh!” she exclaimed with a bright smile. “Definitely yellow!”

 

“You like it then?” Eric said with a self-satisfied smirk.

 

“It looks like Russell’s house,” she observed after going through the floor plans with a less superficial glance than before. Indeed Eric had instructed the architect to take the same inspiration from Palladio’s Villa Rotunda which Russell’s mansion was clearly modelled after.

 

“Some old CCTV footage from Fangtasia informed me you like that house.”

 

“I do. Almost traded your life and Bill’s for it,” she finished with an innocently teasing wink. “Won’t it be too big?”

 

“I thought we agreed we could use the extra room soon,” Eric countered as his hands traced over her now flattened stomach.

 

“So soon?” she whispered against his lips.

 

“It’ll be ready by Thanksgiving.”

 

“That’s nine months from now,” Sookie returned with confusion.

 

His eyebrows rose with a knowing look while hands sought out the bare flesh hidden underneath her robe. “Exactly.”

 

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-The End-

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A/N: Thank you all for coming on this crazy and sometimes downright insane ride with me and of course your conviction that the Niall/Pam ship was one to happily board in the end when I clearly had other thought on the matter. Thank you for the encouragement and excitement on this story that was only supposed to be a few chapters long… I hope you all enjoyed the conclusion of the epilogue, that it finally washed away the bitter aftertaste of that finale in the process, and I’ll miss writing Spike and Crazy Niall but I’m sure they’ll pop up now and then even if it is just in a sporadic outtake.

 

A very special thanks to MsBuffy who edited through these fixin’s like a pro (which she is in every sense of the word and I’m still slightly fearful of the bill I’m expecting to come my way 🙂 ). I don’t think I would have made this far and with my sanity intact had she not helped me out with the workload I had shifted on to myself. I looked it up today, I wrote nearly 90,000 words for the fixin’s series including the outtakes in the three months since the series finale aired alongside my other WIPs but apart from a few fretful moments I enjoyed penning this story all along for its preposterousness and outlandish storylines and I’m surely going to miss this crazy family and the kids and I don’t think I can ever look at spaghetti ever the same.

 

MsBuffy has also been kind enough to go over the earlier chapters before she came on board to Beta because I know at the speed these were churned out mistakes were left to linger. As soon as I get them back (and I stressed she take her merry time with them) I will be putting up a .pdf and .epub version under the download section for those who would like a bundled copy to keep.

 

Last but not least the intrusion of Spike was appreciated by most though some had to catch on who exactly he was. So for the love of Spike (and his Buffy) enjoy the video below that I found while doing some research for his character. Whether just to remember them or if you’re contemplating watching the series, if this won’t turn you into a Spuffy loving ally I don’t know what will, but tell me what you thought of this ending before you press that play button 😉

 

 

Bonfire of the Vanities chapter 20 is here.

63 thoughts on “Thanksgiving Fixin’s 38

    1. Awww thanks 🙂 Spike was never supposed to be there, for a long time I joked to MsBuffy that my ending to this crazy soap opera would be Spike switching off the TV on his beloved ‘Passions’ and saying his show had gone to shit. Somewhere along the way he weaseled his way in to the story instead and I think it worked out for the better.

      Liked by 1 person

  1. So sad to see this story end!
    The scene between Spike/Willa/Jason/Dr. Ludwig was so priceless…
    eric and Sookie building a new home for them and all of the family…
    Naill and Pam going on their honeymoon…
    Thank you for sharing this amazing story with us…
    P.S. loved the Spike/Buffy video too!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. The ‘foursome’ was quite fun to write and well… completely in tune with the outlandishness this story inspired. Oh and the home is for Sookie and Erric and their kids only, I figured they’d all appreciate some space of their own. I’m not usually one for the vids but it was more effective than rewatchig the actual show but I loved that video of their story, it needed to be shared. I’m glad to hear you enjoyed that and thank you for your continued support and enthusiasm on this story 😍

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    1. Glad to hear you enjoyed this story too. Did you ever read the earlier fixin’s? One had a reunion with Gran and some other deceased characters in it and I know you were looking for that in a Christmas fic from a FB thread.

      Yeah I kind re-fell in love with those two too from that video. Always liked them together but especially this video made me think TB should really have taken a page from their book on this in displaying a relationship that wasn’t easy, difficult to watch sometimes but never boring. The love was there, spoken or not. It feels like such a loss that they never explored the relationship between E/S beyond a few days in amnesia land where the books at least gave it a shot.

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      1. I read EVERYTHING you wrote unless you haven’t posted it yet…I agree both the books and the shows screwed the pooch on E/S they broke so many of their own rules to make things work the way they wanted them to rather than how the public at large did…

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        1. I somehow got it stuck in my head that you had yet to read the earlier singular Fixin’ stories #1-13 and that you skipped straight to this outtake. Probably because you didn’t leave a ‘like’ or comments on those (not that you are required to by any means).

          There’s an ode to an annoying plagiarist on here somewhere but it’s the only thing I don’t advertise writing but maybe you caught that when it was first posted.

          You know I’m not one for adhering to whatever the majority of an audience wants by any means, it usually makes for poor storytelling but it seemed in both TB and SVM they were just stubbornly writing against their own currents, which turned it into an exercise in grabbing at straws. I always consider the beginnings as rich soil and that AB + CH both knew that and assumed that was just enough to make things grow… *sigh*

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          1. Well I will need to double checking my ‘liking’…I know sometimes if there a lot of “noise” between the end of a chapter and the like button I forget to click it and while it is a rule that I only ‘like’ the things I love there was nothing of your I didn’t love, you know it should really be love button I think…The further I get into the books the more disappointed I became and while the show was good for visuals even it was found to be lacking after the first few seasons…If they are gonna create a set of rules than they should stick to them not just arbitrarily move around chess pieces willy nilly because they may get better ratings…

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            1. I don’t think it was even about ratings, they probably would have scored higher if they did some market research. TB made its money in DVD sales not with selling advertising space. Outside of this little fanfic fandom the characters of Pam, Lafayette, Jason and Jessica are the most popular after Eric, in that order. I think Sookie dangles below somewhere near Bill. Those side characters were given very little screen time in favour of new OC’s that no one cared about except maybe the writers. A lot of them also jumped ship as soon as the TB ship started sinking. Season seven had two of the original writers left I believe and one of them was BB…

              I think they got cocky initially with their sudden popularity when the first season didn’t even perform that well and it sort of became ‘let’s do whatever we feel like’. As long as the DVD’s sold no one bothered to hold them accountable for their diverging content…

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              1. As soon as I finished reading the books I went online looking for the wtf??? and found FF and yeah whole other world, it is where anything is possible…authors and shows could learn a lot from FanFic authors…

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                1. I had a similar experience, you kind of wanted to know you weren’t the only one sharing in the misery of those latter books. The last one had me reeling for months, something no other book has managed and I’ve read plenty HEA or not which is by no means a requirement to me to give closure in a story.

                  I only vaguely peeked into other fandoms so I don’t know if it’s universal but I was astounded by the quality of certain authors in the SVM/TB genre, there are a couple that I would say easily eclipse the source material.

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                  1. Same here I don’t think I read for a few months after that last book, I just couldn’t believe that it could be fucked away so thoroughly…And I wholeheartedly agree with some SVM/TB authors being better than “her” and there are some where you read that first paragraph and you have to wonder what were they thinking and who told them it was a good idea to put pen paper

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                    1. I try not to comment too much on other’s people’s work as my tastes are finicky. For example I have issues with writings in the present tense, it always reads juvenile to me unless its explicitly engineered that way for stylistic purposes, but I have yet to see that occur in fanfiction. I might be missing out on some great stories but I’ve tried with several and have just had to walk away from them.

                      We’re all amateurs here so we’re allowed to make mistakes and stumble and fall a bit so I can’t judge too harshly on anyone who gives it a go, whatever the results. The review etiquette of being kind and complimenting on one side with the guest reviews on the other side make it a bit of a bizarre world to enter in.When I don’t like something I just move along but I’m probably doing some a disservice by not pointing out that a dedicated beta or the help of a more established writer could help them along. However, I’m still deeply amazed how many people are willing to read the more inferior stuff but I’m hypercritical so that probably says more about me than them.

                      I’ve had to reevaluate the way I do things now and then in the process of posting because you don’t generally read the chapters in succession where I do write them as such, you might miss the subtleties so I have to highlight those now and then in the editing, expanding certain things to what reviewers indicate they are looking forward to in an upcoming chapter, etc.

                      I find the motivations to why people choose to write interesting, For me it was simply I was running out of quality stuff to read and certain thoughts had sparked ideas but I write for myself first and foremost. Before embarking on this I hadn’t written a word of fiction (unless you count the little white lies 😉 ) since a high school assignment so it was a gamble if it would resonate but that wasn’t my motivation to begin with so I would have been fine with it either way. I know a lot of the writer’s ‘get off’ on the reviews and recognition. I prefer one well written thoughtful review to ten ‘Great chapter’ etc.type reviews and find the stats on what part of the world readers are from more interesting than the hit count. It always seem that the stories that aren’t that great over on ff.net usually scream and beg for reviews and I sometimes wonder if that’s all they’re writing for…

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                    2. I agree ‘great chapter’ is a cop out I try to never use but you see that a lot on those that hold chapters hostage until they get an x-number of reviews. I’d rather have one well thought out review than lip service. If I don’t like something I just don’t acknowledge it anyway, I’ve seen enough bad reactions to bad reviews that I know it’s a road I don’t want to go down. Now if I like something then I will read everything they’ve ever written and let them know in any way that I love what they are doing but I try to not come off obsessive about it, don’t know if I always succeed but (shrugs shoulders). Fanfiction is just a drop in the bucket for what I really read but I’d be just as likely to give it up as I would Jane Austen, R A Salvatore or Stephen King…

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                    3. On ff.net there’s no like button so I accept the ‘great chapters’ etc. simply as that, they usually only get a single word of thanks back from me in the process. I forgot about the holding chapters hostage… the one time I came across that I closed down the story instantly for such childish behaviour. I feel there should be some allowance for constructive criticism, but like writing not everyone is well versed in that. Now it happens anonymously or on FB usually outside the author’s view, neither one is a pretty sight.

                      I tend to be loyal to certain authors too, especially with the non fanfiction stuff. If I discover something new I love everything they ever wrote gets devoured. I consider the fanfiction stuff my light reading; which is great for the everyday before going to bed but I delve into the more high brow stuff in vacation time because I like to read those in one sitting. There’s something really rewarding about not having to put a book down for hours on end.

                      You don’t come off as obsessive to me at all, so I say you’ve succeeded 🙂 . I’ve received some very complimentary ‘letters’ through the PM system in the past on ff.net but it usually borders on admiration rather than obsession so I can only ever appreciate those.

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                    4. Yeah I think of FF like a danielle steele novel…it’s just something to take the edge off. I have totally done that ‘read everything they’ve written’ thing I must have checked out 20 books from the library just so I would have them all as soon as I finished one it was on to the next, of course I need to take a week long break from reading since I’d read them all in like 3 days. If I pick it up I read it cover to cover and if I didn’t like it I just don’t read anything else they’ve written…Atlas shrugged is my only exception to that rule, I opened the it to the first page and immediately returned it and will never pick it up again.

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                    5. I don’t think anyone likes Atlas Shrugged… it’s kind of hard to get through a text where the author is so adamant about what you have to read into it where a book simply becomes the medium for a message.
                      The worst part about finishing everything an author ever wrote though is that detox period where you realise there’s nothing left to read ever or the waiting game starts which is far longer than the slowest of the ff writers… I’ve thought about doing book recommendations on the blog here but my tastes are so diverse from most I doubt it really reaches an audience.

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                    6. My reasoning for atlas is more of a perverse superstitious thing, the date on the first page was the exact date I chose to read it…creeped me the hell out. And you get a big head nod from me waiting for the Wheel of Time series to finish was worse that having a tooth pulled. I think you should do the rec’s if you have the time and inclination to do so, some of my favorite authors were picked up solely based on someone’s recommendation. I read everything from Dumas to Austen to King to Tolkien to Clancy to anything that peaks my curiosity…

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                    7. I’ll consider it but the blog stats do sort of indicate anything non Eric/Sookie related gets very little interest. I do other fanfic recs now and then when I’m not posting that week for whatever reason. My reading tastes have no rhyme or reason, if I know I’ll be travelling somewhere new I’ll pick up books that take place there and through some sort of associative logic I end up with another title that had nothing to do with the last one. I do tend to avoid the over-hyped bestsellers though, they only ever seem to disappoint in my book…

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                    8. While I would take the rec in the light in which hey are intended I also am only one person and I get what you mean. And yes to the over hyped crap, I have to this day never read any Nicholas Sparks book, why bother when they are just gonna make a movie out of it anyway, I also steer clear of anything labeled “romance” (think harlequin) I’ve read better FF than some of those published books turn out to be…

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                    9. I kind of like that fanfiction isn’t categorized into one set genre. I write in light of the show, so it has different elements and genres in a single story, only one of which is romance. I steer clear of anything romance related to read too. I still cringe at the sight of the Harlequin type novels whenever visiting my grandmother. I try not to think about it too much… The only thing I’ve ever read that could be labeled as ‘romance’ is from the Romantic period and that’s a completely different genre in every way, which as an Austen fan I’m sure you are aware. I am considering reading ‘One Day’ by David Nicholls though because I recently caught the movie on Netflix by chance and I really liked the concept, possibly for a future fic, but I wouldn’t recommend it here because though the ending (in the movie at least) gives great closure its not a HEA and that seems to be a big deal-breaker to the ff crowd.

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                    10. Nodding about Austen (reading P&P for the umpteenth time right now) and about Grandma’s and Harlequin (mine was obsessed ugh). I’ll have to google that author and book I haven’t heard of either. I’m mixed on the HEA, I don’t need it to love something and it’s unrealistic to expect it every time…sometimes just having the main character survive and have learned something from their journey is enough because you know in your heart they will go on and they will find that HEA but you don’t need to see the words written out to know that it’ll happen. And to note your earlier comment about writers, if you are inspired by this moive/book than go for it whether your readers love it or hate it write it for you and open yourself to a whole new fan base…

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                    11. If a story is stronger without the HEA I’m fine with that. I actually quite prefer open endings. I’m old enough not to want a Disney ending at every turn but I understand the need for escapism with most readers and definitive closure on the E/S front. Frankly I think CH traumatised a lot of people with the latter books so I won’t begrudge that desire here even if it does feel somewhat cliche at times.

                      ‘One Day’ chronicles one day over a twenty year time period between the two main protagonists. Each year is one chapter and it’s really a novel way to tell the story and I was contemplating doing it with an E/S story-line. Nicholls just released a new book ‘Us’ a few months back which is a post HEA story (not related to One Day) but I’m considering starting with that instead and devouring his other novels if it pleases. The reviews on it were very good so that is encouraging.

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                    12. I loathe disney and their cookie cutter we all lived happily ever after, and while I was beyond disappointed with the ending of SVM the reality is E/S never would have gotten their happily ever after cluviel dor or not there was just way too much lying and miscommunication between them (but Sam really ewww) I would have rathered that she was happy and alone.

                      I am intrigued by this now and will have to see if I can get it from my online library for my kindle (claps hands like a dork something new something new!!!)

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                    13. I wasn’t expecting a HEA for the show or the books. It stopped being in the cards at some point but it only reinforced this notion of lost potential… *sigh* I’m over it now, writing and reading can do that for you 😁.

                      Let me know if it’s any good if you get to Nicholls before me. I probably won’t get to it till the end of the year. I loved the film though for which he wrote the screenplay and I usually hate romantic comedies.

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                    14. I always cry when they unplug Shelby and when Frodo gets on the ship with Gandalf and the rest of the Elves (and sometimes during a hallmark commercial but we don’t need to share that with anyone else)…

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                    15. I fully expected the last book to end as it did, so it wasn’t a surprise to me. What really pissed me off, especially since I’d been defending the author’s right to write her story however she planned (mo’ money, mo’ money), was that lovely “coda” that makes a terrific coaster for steaming hot beverages since it’s such a pile of steaming hot crap. In there she writes the complete antithesis of Eric Northman thereby destroying the character she created! Honestly, I think it just all became too much for her, and she never expected anything like what happened. I would also swear on a stack of Bibles that she did not write those last three books. They sounded/read nothing like her previous ones, nor any of her other books. Dare I say she used…ghostwriters? LOL! I’m certain she’s happily spending her way through every WalMart in Arkansas.

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                    16. Agreed on writing whatever an author wants… CH’s writing was never that stellar to begin with but it deteriorated along with the makeup of the characters the further on into the books. I haven’t even bothered to glance at the coda it’s where every CH brain fart went to die.

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                    17. CH’s work will never be considered great literature, but it was simple and entertaining; I didn’t have to put much thought into it. One would think that with two continuity people as well as knowing her own character mythos (hey, these ARE coming from my imagination!), things wouldn’t have deteriorated so poorly as they did. I found these books through my Book Club & thought they sounded fun and light, but that was when Book 8 was just coming out, and then I saw a preview for TB. I checked back with the Club, and recognized they were the same story, so I bought all of them to read just before the show started. I loved them; very comical, very light, very original in plot with the vamps coming out of the coffin, and I just adored Sookie. I don’t typically read this genre, but I didn’t really consider these to be in the Supernatural genre. They seemed to be more like fun mysteries that had vampires in them, and one of my first thoughts was that these were “Buffy,” stories, yet all grown up. The drama over who Sookie was with in the end & how CH ended the books was ridiculous and people really need to grow up about that matter. It was evident that Sookie would be with Sam at the end from the first book, and of course things between her & Eric would end terribly. It was inevitable. The coda was just too far over the top. After 13 books & umpteen short stories, you end things with complete antithesis of your most-beloved character? Not only unprofessional, but it’s a cop out. I only had this to say to CH at the time: Sherlock Holmes. Dr. Moriarty killed him in one of Doyle’s stories, and this happened because Holmes was unhappy at the popularity of his esteemed detective in the series published through the newspaper, so he killed him off by his arch-nemesis. The furor and uproar over this caused Doyle so much grief that he brought back Sherlock Holmes from the dead… Like a vampire. 🙂

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                    18. It isn’t my usual genre of fiction either, to put in perspective I read the book True Blood and Philosophy before the SVM series. It was something to read between the seasons with the knowledge they were different enough and I read the majority of it in bulk. The thing is it started out (the title even refers to it) as a crime solving mystery thing, Sookie’s love life somehow took over and the ‘mystery’ formula that strung a book together became completely irrelevant and everything became muddled in the process without that rigid structure. The fact that TB barely bothered with it says enough on the considered importance. So many story arcs (hello fairies) were set up and nothing would really come of it. I didn’t care where or with whom Sookie ended up, I pretty much pegged Sam from the first books but I guess if you read one a year for over a decade that knowledge gets lost. I think CH was forced into taking the narrative in certain ways, Bill wasn’t allowed to be killed, Eric’s popularity forced a larger presence into the storyline, more books were added, etc. and I do sort of feel that the degradation of those characters in the end was a response to the strangle hold the books became for her at some point, it’s how she was able to take control of the situation. It was her ending from the inception and that’s how she wanted to end it. It’s her prerogative and it will most likely impact future sales of new series but she can live with herself without regret.

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                    19. I’ve heard a lot of people say also that they thought it was ghost writers. Mu biggest issue and it applies to other series (the black dagger) these authors create all these rules for their characters o abide by but then it seems like their fan base or reviews die down and they start changing things up just to try to stir the pot. I get that makers rule is absolute but once he was dead the contract should have been void or his choice to follow through on….And I have no words for her ending up with sam just none

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                    20. Simply because I at times revert back to my rational legal thinking, I had the same thoughts about Appius, the marriage contract, and all of that ridiculousness. It would seem to me that with Appius having met the final death, and having released Eric at least 700 centuries prior, any contract negotiated on behalf of his progeny would be null and void upon his true death; however, this was CH’s world where all that came before was forgotten in order to end Eric & Sookie’s tempestuous relationship because they apparently weren’t doing well enough on their own with their fantastic communication skills outside of bed, against the wall, on the kitchen table or island, his office, work desk, or any place I may have missed. This isn’t exactly uncommon in fiction or reality. I made great money in private practice from real people with the same issues. However, one thing that is mostly always counted on in stories where the couple with the great love & tempestuous, fiery, passionate, scintillating, and most compelling relationship with the sometime edge of seat will they/won’t they question on everyone’s lips NEVER LAST. They burn brightly, with the hottest of white & blue flames, yet they burn out just as quickly as much as they try to hold on to the dying embers. This is what happened with Sookie & Eric, and fortunately the books ended before all the bitterness could set in; the heartbreak and resulting anger and despair were enough. I have to commend CH on that though; she did make that palpable, it came through clearly and was especially heartbreaking to read through Sookie’s narration. They were both equally responsible in the demise, and the marriage contract sealed it. I thought it was pretty clever, if not farfetched even for Supernatural fiction. Why shouldn’t a woman want it all? Men expect it every day. Wanting it all doesn’t necessarily mean a white picket fence & children, so I don’t get the vitriol about that. They both had choices out of their control foisted upon them and perhaps those were for the better. If you think back to most of the classics where there were the ever passionate, tempestuous relationships between the main characters, they didn’t last and resulted in great heartbreak and sometime lifelong bitterness. By no means am I implying that CH’s work with the SVM’s will ever be classic, but I do believe she “borrowed” heavily from some of them. I liked Sam, and had no problem with the two of them embarking slowly on a relationship that was quite a long time in coming. Who would not want to spend their life with their best friend, and make no mistake, Sam was & had been by Sookie’s own admission her best friend throughout the entire series. He was her anchor, her confidante, and always there for her, even more so than Eric, yet he never pressured her for more than her friendship. That was a man who truly loved a woman when he was willing to put aside his own feelings to accept just her friendship. Think about it…

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                    21. Sense and Sensibility…Marianne and John (sookie and Eric) but then Marianne and Colonel Brandon (sookie and Sam)….yeah I get where you are going with that 😉

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              2. You are correct; only one original writer was left for Season 7 of TB, and Brian Buckner, who had already been a producer on the show and was the replacement for another Exec. Producer for Alan Ball during Season 6 was another writer. He had written only one previous episode prior to Season 6. The Exec. Producer who was let go was not going in the direction of AB’s vision; therefore, he got the boot, and what we might have seen happen with Eric & Sookie after he returned her house to her never came to pass. Instead we got… Vamp Camp and Warlow? We also got Niall, so every cloud does have a silver lining.

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                1. I’m pretty sure BB wrote Into the Dragon’s Den which is the episode with the most inconsistencies… like Bill announcing to a room full of vampires Sookie is a telepath and not even in a whisper…

                  I think it’s difficult to maintain a popular coupling on a show without it becoming all about them so I understood their reluctance but latter seasons just sort of forgot to acknowledge Eric and Sookie might actually know each other… they should have just given Eric a spinoff show like they did with Angel at that point…

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            2. I agree about the button! I’ve been saying for years that it should be “love,” not “like!” So happy to find someone who agrees with me! 🙂

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              1. Like just doesn’t seem to be strong enough, though there are some fics out there that are only like worthy but for the ones that are amazing I think they need a different button like and Amazing button!

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                1. So true! I think we need several different option! Perhaps we should make these suggestions to WordPress in several separate requests and see what happens! Oh! I’ve just found a new project for the new year besides babysitting grandchildren! How rewarding it would be if we were able to make such a change! Let’s talk about in the new year; catch me on my blog where I hope to be spending more time in the near future! I love these ideas, Charity! 🙂

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                  1. That would be an amazing feat to behold lol…When you come across a finished fic commenting on every chapter seem pointless…it’s done no opinion is needed anymore…so something other than like to show you enjoyed it would be awesome, like just seems so “hey yeah I read it now what” but I always click like on the things I enjoy and if I didn’t like a particular chapter I won’t like it…

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  2. This has been a most delightful story. I know which part I like best, it’s all good. It does appear that Eric is planning on a large family. I suppose he needs to keep up with Pam and Niall. Loved the foursome at the end. Ludwig is always a hoot and I love Spike. Thank you so much.

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    1. I assumed the ‘don’t’ got lost in typing, no worries. I figure Eric will want a soccer team each so he and Pam can square off, so that’ll be eleven at least… Glad to hear you liked the ‘foursome’ I figured it was the best way to portray the drunken aftermath of a good Supernatural wedding. Thanks for the love and support of this little tale including the love of Spike who is such fun to write… 🙂

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  3. I LOVED IT ALL!! Then you know that already! I have to say though that I was truly, literally laughing my fat ass off while editing this chapter, so if there are typos, it’s all on me! This was just so damn funny I had to share it with my husband who actually laughed with me because he is familiar with all of these characters, including Spike! We both agree that Eric & Bill are doppelgangers for Spike & Angel, so just how creative is CH anyway? Never mind all that, these were funny, hilarious, pain-inducing laughter FUN!! The introduction of Spike topped off everything, and yes, I may never look at spaghetti the same way again, but I’ll always look at it with great humor and gratitude to you, my favored ingrate! Thank you for all the rip-roaring great times, not just with the chapters, but with the emails as well. The best thing is that I get to edit the earlier chapters now so I’ll be laughing all through a miserable January and I can’t think of a better way to spend one than laughing! The video just put the icing on the cake bringing back sweet memories. I loved working with you on this, and everything else! 🙂

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    1. I haven’t found any typos but I did wonder… halfway through I had no mistakes at all… here I was thinking I was perfection when it was just you laughing… mmph…No more talk of Eric, Bill, Spike and Angel please that’s bringing up horrible thoughts of foursomes… which would be Angel and Bill sulking in a corner while the two blondes duke it out who gets to be on top… no no not happening… I’ll happily pass on my title as favoured ingrate to avoid this at all costs.

      I do love that video and it sort of consolidated that Buffy did the opposite of TB. It started off a little shoddy but she grew up, became a mature individual and the show grew with that. The relationship between Buffy and Spike was complex, difficult, mature but most importantly adult, poor Sookie never got that…

      I love(d) working with you. It saves me so much time for other stuff and you’re nice enough to just say “Shut up! This is perfect!” when I’m in a I hate everything I write mode. Plus you regale all these things that get used. Without you Pam wouldn’t have the crazy labour she did and there would be no ‘porno penises’ without your querying about circumcisions… I’m going to have to reread this myself one time, this story was bonkers…

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      1. AH! My eyes! I’m an old woman; don’t put those images in my poor deteriorating brain! Eric & Spike wouldn’t do one another anyway. They would look at each other & ask, “Who does your wardrobe?” and then check all the similarities… Sorry, Spike. We never got the 411 on your appendage, so Eric wins the GP award, over & over & over, ad infinitum… I have to say that Angel wouldn’t even like Bill. Angel & Spike were friends, reluctant ones, but they were friends initially. Spike would just hate him because he’s named Bill, making a mockery of his real name, so once again, Bill would be alone on the playground. So sad, too bad.

        The thought about the circumcisions came from my ingrates and the male child one already has, and the impending birth of the other. We have interesting dinner conversations… It is elective surgery in the US, and, no, we’re not paying. We do draw the line on certain things; birth and care of the infant being one of those. We’ll take them at two when the mother abandons them once more, but we’re getting older so we may have to raise the intake age of abandoned grandchildren.

        You really do need to read the story in its entirety; it’s fucking hilarious! Other than the Supernatural bent, it was somewhat like reading about the relatives. Bonkers fits so well. I’ll have the editing done next month though since I’m saving it for a dreary January. Fun, fun, fun! 🙂

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        1. I don’t think it really matters how big Spike’s appendage is, he had that fluid choreographed movement of his body down so as long as it isn’t micro Bill sized we should be good. Anyway Niall has them all beat with his firehose! LOL. I think Angel would like Alcide from all the TB offerings, they were both rather reluctant in accepting their supernatural half and they even have a similar build… but they would just be doing very straight male things. Like wood chopping and throwing boulders around for no reason. Bill will just have to play with Drusilla and her dollies on the playground because Momma Lorena forced him to even though he thinks girls are icky. Is it weird that I want to write this when they’re actually all like five or six?

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